Spalletti’s Last Stand

So the boss says ‘no surrender’ after losing 3-0 to Norway? Bold. But when your xGA is higher than their entire season average, maybe ‘no surrender’ should come with a side of tactical retraining.

Creativity drought? More like dribble drought. Our wingers took on defenders like they were scared of germs — 1.3 successful take-ons? That’s not football, that’s self-defense.

And don’t get me started on the offside trap… it didn’t fail — it surrendered mid-sentence.

You’ve got stats screaming ‘relegation candidate’, sir. Time to bench loyalty and start trusting data instead.

You still think this team’s got soul? Or just trauma?

Comment below: Support Spalletti or demand an intervention? 👇